4 Months...ish

I realized yesterday that I really haven't kept up with this blog at all.  I know it's helped some people out with what to expect after surgery, but you might be wondering what it's like a little longer down the track.

I'm pretty much back to normal now.  It does still hurt from time to time - that's mostly my scars though and having a bra or shirt for example rub against them.  I've heard other people talk about shooting pains every now and then, and it happens occassionally to me too.  It's like a short electric shock/cramp in your boob.  Kind of weird and annoying but easy enough to ignore.

Now, I am still numb on the bottom half of my breasts.  It's kind of normal now, but I had hoped that would have gone away by now.  I'm not at the 6 month point yet though so I still remain hopeful that it will go away.  It doesn't bother me too much - it's just funny playing games with my husband "Now I feel it, now I don't"...

Back in October I started a new job which I was really worried about.  I work as a tutor for 1st Grade kids, and let me tell you - they get very clingy and love to run directly at you, launch themselves and hug you.  I've been headbutted in the boobs a few times.  It hurt like hell, but I'm sure it wouldn't have been to lovely before the surgery either.  My daughter has elbowed me a few times too, but it's rare and big hugs and other physical activity doesn't scare me anymore.

The scars are still pretty awesome.  I've never taken pictures to see how they are improving so I can't look back and compare, but it's only my husband and I seeing them, and clothes fully cover them.  I went to a water park a few weeks back and you couldn't see them with a swim suit on which was good news.  (I was too scared to go down a waterslide with my excuse being that my boobs might get knocked...they may have been knocked but really I just hate waterslides).

The surgeon told me that at about the 3 month period my boobs would be much more natural looking - right after the surgery they were very...'perky' shall we say which I can't say I minded.  But they have dropped a little, but still much perkier than my previous 'after two kids' look.  As they really are natural looking minus the scars.

I did stop running for a while - I made it to week 6 of Couch to 5K, but then my Plantar Fasciitis acted up, and I got Sesamoiditis  on the same foot (OUCH!!) so I took some time off.  But just this weekend I agreed to run a Half Marathon in April.  What the hell am I thinking???!!!??? So I'm back in training, still having to double bra it, but it's proof that I am back to normal...and not bouncing boobie lady anymore!

If you ask me now, if I am glad I did it, then I would still say 100% YES!!  The pain and recovery was awful.  I'm not going to lie.  I was not prepared for how awful it was, and although I've never had implants obviously, it's nothing that you can compare with that.  If someone says "I understand the pain, I had implants"...they don't really understand the true magnitude of it.  But although I still have some discomfort associated with the surgery, I would still do it all over again.  My back pain has almost disappeared - it still aches from time to time but I don't often have to take any painkillers for it, which makes it completely worth it, and has made my quality of life much better.

8 Weeks

So it's been 8 weeks since my surgery now, and for the most part I'm back to normal.  I got the all clear to run at my 6 week check up, so I started back on the Couch to 5k program two weeks ago.  It's been VERY important to wear a good bra - I have one high impact bra out of 5 that I can wear and I wear it over a Genie Bra too.  So far so good.  The first week the bruising on my ribs hurt a little, but today it hasn't been an issue.

Everything is back to normal now as far as activities.  I can steam clean my floors again which was the last household chore that bothered me, and Monday I even mowed the yard. 

There is still occasional pain.  I'm still very tender at the side of my breasts which catches me my surprise when I go to lay down on my side or move the wrong way.  And I have a tender spot on my ribs that "pulls" when I raise my arm to take a shirt off for example. I think that tender spot is where my bra crosses over the scar which is OK until the end of the day and I can't wait to get into a Genie Bra again.  And I can almost lay on my belly again when I sleep.

Bra shopping is much more pleasant.  There's actually my size in the PX now, and they are so much cuter - they can't double as a hat anymore!!

I've been using coconut oil on my scars.  I don't know if that helps, but I'll just pretend that it does.  The scars are getting better, although the ones below my breast are still pretty red and gnarly looking. And the lower portions of my breast are still completely numb.  I guess that's pretty normal for 6 - 7 months after surgery.

My back pain is almost non-existant now.  I have to sit with a pillow behind my back, but I can't remember the last time I took a pain killer. So that alone makes everything worth it.

4 Weeks

Today marks 4 weeks since the surgery.  The recovery is going pretty well.  Technically today I'm able to wear an underwire bra.  I'm not sure about that...we'll see.  I might hit the mall today to see what's available.

My kids are back at school, so I have plenty of spare time.  I tried to go for a 2 - 3 mile walk the other day, but being in the heat of NC, it didn't really feel that great.  I'll try again tomorrow maybe.  It's not pleasant getting sweaty right now, let's put it that way.

I'm doing most activities like usual now.  I can drive with very little discomfort - unlike a week ago where I couldn't relax my arms. I have to be careful with things like vacumming, and I haven't attempted to steam clean my floors yet...but that's what husbands are for, right.  The only thing that I had a mini panic attack about was trying to open the lid of a spaghetti sauce jar.  I almost had to ask a neighbor to open it for me, but after beating the heck out of the lid with the back of a knife I managed to open it.

My sensitivity issue is still there, but not as bad as what it was last week.  I just look permanently "happy". But it's not unbearable like it was.  This gives me hope that oneday they will return to normal.

My surgical glue is also peeling off like crazy.  I had to use Neosporin in a few patches because it made the wound ooze a little.  Not bleeding as such, but maybe it pulled more than just the glue off.  It's a little gross - like I'm Frankenstein or something, but it's not painful.

So, I'm pretty happy with how things are going.  I'm completely off painkillers which is the first time in a very, very long time.  I'm still unsure if it's because I'm taking things easy, or if the reduction really did help my back out a bit.  I have had a few niggles in my back, but nothing close to how bad it was prior to the surgery.  My shoulder is bugging me again since I've been sleeping on my side a bit.  So I think maybe new pillows would help me more than anything.

I really hope that in the next few weeks I'll be pain free, and that some of the numbness I have (the top half of my tata's are overly sensitive, and the bottom half are numb).  I'm eager to start running again, but I think it will take longer than week 6 like I thought. We'll see.

Sensitive Much?

Today is day 3 of being on my own, and 3 weeks post surgery.  So far, so good.  I've kept busy doing laundry, floors, breakfast, lunch, dinner, playing outside, running errands....I've managed it, but I never said it was sensible.  By the time dinner rolled around I was so exhausted that I just wanted to crawl into a hole and cry. I was tired, and sore and just miserable. So basically I need to slow down just a little.  While I'm getting buns of steel from squatting to get anything low down, it's not necessary to do everything I was doing before surgery. I need to remind myself that's it's OK to sit on my ass and ignore the daily chores and do just what I HAVE to do.

My biggest issue right now is my nipple sensitivity.  I was told I may have a lot of numbness.  Nope.  It's terrible.  It's like I've got a Christian Grey in my bra who won't leave my nipples alone. It's like they are raw, although they're not.  Like they've been rubbed with sandpaper. It's pretty painful actually.  From what I've researched it's normal, although being numb is more common. I've heard some remedies from Cocoa Butter to Lanolin which may help, or putting cotton balls on them so they don't rub. (Which in my Genie Bra they're not rubbing.) I just hope it goes away because it's driving me up the wall.  Some people have this sensation for years, and some for just a few weeks. I'm praying for the few weeks option.  My poor husband will never be able to touch my boobs again if they stay like this.

On a more positive note, I rolled over onto my side and slept this morning.  Rolled over!!  Not lifting myself up and gently laying down.  I did have to hug my pillow very close to my chest but I'll take it.  I'm considering getting a body pillow, or sleeping with a Teddy Bear - the top boob and gravity feels a bit weird right now so it needs that additional support. But I was comfortable and slept a little bit until my daughter woke me up.

So I'm doing pretty good.  I just need to remember to take things easy. 

Two weeks and 5 days post surgery

Today is a big day in my recovery.  My husband went back to work today, and he has college right after work too, so I won't see him until about 10pm tonight. So it's just me and the kids all day.

I also need to drive in town, and if anyone has ever driven in Fayetteville, NC you would understand why I'm nervous.  I'm sure I'll be fine so long as I don't need to make any emergency stops.

Aside from driving, the only other thing I was worried about was being able to reach the cereal boxes.  My husband must love me because he took them down before he left for work.

I came home from Florida on Sunday and the drive was much more comfortable than the drive down.  I still had my pillow on my chest incase of bumps.  And yesterday was my big day out.  I went with my husband to the Pembroke Campus to pick up his text book. (On a side note, when the hell did I get so old.  I felt like a Grandma walking around the campus).  Then we braved the Commissary on Ft Bragg.  I made it through without wanting to punch anyone which is an accomplishment on any given day.  I was tired by the time I got home, but I spent an additional 3 - 4 hours outside with the kids and chatting to neighbors.  That made me feel good because I just couldn't have done that a week ago.  And my neighbors commented that I must be feeling a lot better because I was dressed cute.  Yay me.  

Slowly but surely, right?

Oh, and I've also been able to have a bath!!  I love baths so I hate during any kind of recovery when I'm not allowed one.

I'm getting closer to being able to lay on my side - I just don't like how the top boob feels.  It's like it's pulling down a little.  Maybe a body pillow would help.  I've also gone down to one Motrin horse pill a day.  I take it right before bed to help me sleep.  

I'm not in a whole lot of pain - it's just uncomfortable still but not as bad as it was.  I'm getting better just a little at a time, and I'm OK with that.  And only having back/neck/shoulder pain once in the last two weeks, I'll take it!

The Funk

For the most part during the recovery process, I've been able to remain pretty upbeat.  Do I get bored sitting in my recliner doing a cross stitch as Grammy watches hours of Gunsmoke and whatnot?  Of course I do.  

But every few days I just fell into a funk.  I was (and still am) sick of laying on my back to sleep.  My butt is flat as a pancake because I can't get off it unless I'm standing up.  And I really felt like I wasn't getting better.

One morning I tried to lay on my side.  With the help of a pillow held hard to my chest I could lay on my side without too much pain.  It felt good, but then I started weeping out of my wounds where the drains were.

Another morning I woke up and I guess I had done something and the point under my left breast where the horizontal and vertical incisions meet was weeping rather badly. I did call the nurse for my surgeon to check, and I had googled it too.  Apparently it's pretty normal.  She explained that my sutures may be loosening up causing the leaking.  I put a little neosporin on it, and some gauze and within two days it had healed up again.

When the bleeding started I had switched from the compression bra to a Genie Bra (Awesome because they are relatively cheap and you step into them as opposed to having to hook them up or put it over your head).  I had also driven on the Interstate to the Mall and back.  Maybe it was too early to drive.  I don't know, but I did relax a bit more for a few days.

It was just irritating because I felt like I was capable of doing more than I was, but whenever I tried to do more, it bit me in the butt.  It's so hard for me to take each day as it comes.  Every few days I needed to look back and see that I could reach that mug on the top shelf now, or I could shower easier, or that I managed to straighten my hair.

T-Rex Arms

Now, the thing about breast reductions is that your arm movement is restricted.  You can't really fully extend your arms.  You can look up at the cereal box, mugs etc, and lift your arms up....go right up on your tippy-toes....and be no where near close enough to grab that desired item.

Oh, you want an drink of that water sitting on the table right next to you.....but you can't quite reach.  Oh you dropped that on the floor??  Too bad - use your foot to pick it up.

Basically I was like a T-Rex.

OK, so I could lightly clap my hands, but the "oh" came out of my mouth plenty of times.

For instance, my family love to play Phase 10.  Sitting around the table I couldn't shuffle (Not that I can shuffle to begin with so I wasn't particularly upset about this), and I could barely lean forward to get a new card and pass it on. And I was passing it on to my Grammie who has no rotator cuff in her right arm, so she was a T-Rex right along with me.

Slowly but surely my arms are getting more mobile, but it's a slow process for sure.  You just need to be able to laugh it off, and have people around you to help you.